Share this Story

The Bard’s Tale for Android, a Most Foul Yet Humorous Game

This morning, a new game called The Bard’s Tale is available on Google Play that will either offend you with its indecent scantly dressed barmaids (for some that’s a plus) or will have you on your side laughing with its silly Scottish accented main character. The game revolves around the Bard, who is somewhat of a hero and beast slayer. But like all heroes, he enjoys himself a fine ale and the warm company of an attractive woman. 

The controls for the game on a touchscreen are pretty jammed if you aren’t playing on a tablet. There are lots of different actions the Bard can do such as attack, block, move, summon creatures, and more – so you’ll find yourself trying to see through the not-so-transparent controls during most of the game.

Other than the cramped controls, the game has a really fun story, has good looking video game girls with large you-know-whats, and combines slashing monsters with swords and humorous magical adventures. That’s a win in my book. If $6 doesn’t sound completely unreasonable, give it a try maybe?

Play Link ($5.95)



  • Niteperson

    Got some room on the Nexus 7. Downloading tonight.

  • ostensibly

    Wow. I played Bard’s Tale on my Commodore 64. It looks like this has way better graphics than the version I remember.

    • Rob

      Because this isn’t the version you remember. This is an action RPG, previously released on consoles. To be honest, I don’t know why it has the Bard’s Tale name.

      The one you remember is included as a bonus.

      • Himmat Singh

        It’s created by the same person. So yea, it probably expands from the original trilogy.

  • garak0410

    What’s foul about it?

  • Luxferro

    I had this game for my Commodore 64. It’s a classic.

  • My friend had this game on PS2. It is hilarious.

  • WrinkledForeskin

    I finished this game on iOS, its really fun. I usually skip through voiceover scenes in games but this one is really funny and worth listening through.

    • ToddLower

      Didn’t you find it hard to control on the small iPhone screen? Or not that bad once you are used to it? Any tips?

      • WrinkledForeskin

        Played it on ipad, no tips just enjoy the storyline. 🙂

  • Stewie

    Geez, so don’t leave your post as a Harlequin romance Writer there tato …

  • athensjohn

    Great trailer. Looks like a fun game. I might give them some of my $25 Google Play money I haven’t spent.

  • EvanTheGamer

    But like all heroes, he enjoys himself a fine ale and the warm company of an attractive woman. – Who doesn’t?! hah!

    Well…there goes almost the remainder of my $25 Google Play Store credit. Yay!

  • ToddLower

    Cary Elwes is the man! The game was fun on Xbox.

    • JoshGroff

      I’m bad with names, but after finding out he was that guy from the princess bride, that just made it even more of a must purchase game.

  • JoshGroff

    Wow, I just saw this on Tegra Zone this morning, didn’t realize they meant this soon when they said Q3. 🙂 I know what I’m buying tomorrow.

    • EvanTheGamer

      Yeah, same here! Didn’t think The Bard’s Tale would be making its way to our lives and Android devices THIS soon. HELL yeah!

      Next up…Wild Blood!

      • JoshGroff

        Heck yeah, at least I have this and Horn to hold me over.

        Then there’s always some good ol’ dead ops arcade. wonder when they’ll add six-axis support, would be nice to play with my gameklip.

  • I remember playing this game on the original Xbox ages ago. Voiced by Cary Elwes (Westley from The Princess Bride). Definitely worth it!

    • SolipsisticPsychologist

      I love that movie, Andre The Giant at his bumbling finest. Elwes was also hilarious in Robin Hood: Men In Tights, which also featured Dave Chapelle, long before he was known for his tv show.

      • “Unlike other Robin Hoods, I can speak with an English accent.”