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Site Maintenance, and Where’s Kellex?

The site will be undergoing some routine maintenance over the next two days. What does this mean to you? Well we may not have as much coverage as we would like. Rest assured, once this is complete we will be back better than ever. We will still try however to  get any major updates posted for you.

On a side note, I think i saw a bunch of people carrying I*hones abduct Kellex early this morning. No one has seen or heard from him since. Therefore readers if you think you have spotted Kellex, please chime in with a location and who he was with throughout the day. I’ll start.

Kellex last seen at Portland Starbucks being carted off by an angry mob of I*hone users.

  • Rachel

    Maybe MrPicolas IS Kellex ;)

  • Rachel

    Maybe hes hiding for a reason. :) hehe

  • Chris Nimon

    Why would he switch to a 3rd place operating system that hasn't had anything “revolutionary” since the day after it first launched. That would be like trading in your 72 inch 1080p flatscreen for an old 12inch black and white TV with rabbit ears. ios looks similar to Androids app drawer only its not even as good as that. I understand your bitter, I would be to if I were you but its not to late to sign on to one of the several class action lawsuits right now.

  • TheBigApple

    maybe he made the smart decision and left android for iOS!

  • Rachel

    Maybe MrPicolas IS Kellex ;)

  • Rachel

    Maybe hes hiding for a reason. :) hehe

  • TheBigApple

    maybe he made the smart decision and left android for iOS!

    • Chris Nimon

      Why would he switch to a 3rd place operating system that hasn't had anything “revolutionary” since the day after it first launched. That would be like trading in your 72 inch 1080p flatscreen for an old 12inch black and white TV with rabbit ears. ios looks similar to Androids app drawer only its not even as good as that. I understand your bitter, I would be to if I were you but its not to late to sign on to one of the several class action lawsuits right now.

  • Dastdave

    Do you remember the Mythbustaz episode about the cell phone not catching fire while pumping gas? Well, Kellex was testing an i#hone while pumping gas. The gas fumes caused the two antennas to “connect” during a call. This made the phone drop a call, igniting the fumes, then BOOM.

  • Chris Nimon

    Still no word from Kellex? hope it wasn't some kind of family emergency.

  • Chris Nimon

    THIS JUST IN. Malibu police have just found the bodies of a tall skinny blond woman and a man floating in a pool. The woman has been identified as Barbie Millicent Roberts. The man has not yet been identified as they have only been able to see his face in a reflection from the bottom of the pool. The owner of the house, Ken Carson, told police he had no idea what happened. He was last seen fleeing towards Tijuana with a male friend in a pink Jeep.

  • Chris Nimon

    I found him in at a “Love In” in the Hight Ashbury district. He sent me a link from his Enroute app. When I got there he said “thank you for coming Mr. Fox” and began to tell me why he was wearing assless chaps and a ball gag and had puke all over him. Then he showed me the dead Taiwanese shemale. He mumbled something, im not sure what it was, but it sounded like “How the hell does Mario get all those mushrooms and not throw up”? Then he grabbed an 18 inch jelly dildo and a chocolate donut and ran from the house screaming “Wheres that tato? Im never gonna forgive hime for this”

  • Evermour

    kso, im on my incredible and everything looks different. I like it.(:

  • Martis76

    i have no new update of android 2.2. and i have the incredible so what's the deal

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1158799573 Dave Eric Smith

    Very nice “maintenance”! The mobile site is WAY more finger-friendly and easier to use. Thank you! :)

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1158799573 Dave Eric Smith

      However, a quick edit to the stylesheet to lessen line-spacing would be even more welcome. ;)

  • Buckeye71086

    Giggity

  • Jason w.s.

    Holy poop balls, my comment actually went thru! Nice, i can post from my droid again…finally! Thanx for fixin that!

  • Jason w.s.

    Where oh where could kellex have gone, where oh where could he be…

  • Neo1738

    1) i find it funny that the site maintenance is the main part of this article, and Kellex disappearing is a “side note”. Mr Picolas sounds shadier and shadier.

    2) Think if we shipped SJ a Droid X he would let kellex go b/c he would be to amazed at a phone that actually works?

    3) I really would love to ship him a Droid X and see his expression.

  • DeathofGrim

    Google maps
    From: my location
    to: kellex
    error! apple signal blocking this location!
    Noooo porque!!!

  • fish1552

    Oh, and for the record, please refer to the iBone with a lower case “i”. We don't want to give the tutty-fruitty more importance than they deserve nor would you want Steve (hand)Jobs bringing a lawsuit on you for defacing his brand name. :)

  • http://profiles.yahoo.com/u/3BYK2KE5QHYCDOHQ4COU3DOBPA TrevorH

    I saw somebody who needed a manicure and was yelling at all the I*hone carring people in my office, THAT MUST HAVE BEEN HIM. dang it I could have got his autograph too :(

  • Crow

    Earlier Today. . .

    (please cue music here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjMNNpIksaI)

    INT. APPLE HEADQUARTERS – MAIN HALLWAY

    Kellex is led down a low-ceilinged hallway by a squad
    of armored, albeit admittedly meterosexual, iTroopers. His hands are bound and he is
    brutally shoved when he is unable to keep up with the briskly
    marching soldiers. They stop in a smoky hallway as Darth Jobs
    emerges from the shadows. The sinister Dark Lord stares hard
    at the frail young innovator, but Kellex stands tall, defiant.

    KELLEX
    Lord Jobs, I should have known.
    Only you could be so bold. The
    members of Droid-Life will not sit for
    this, when they hear you've attacked
    a …

    JOBS
    Don't play games with me, Your
    'Droidness.' Several wireless
    transmissions were beamed to your phone
    by Open Source Spies. I want to know
    what happened to the plans they sent
    you.

    KELLEX
    I don't know what you're talking
    about. I am a member of an online community
    whose sole aim is to guide and teach…

    JOBS (yelling)
    You're a part of the Open Source Alliance…
    and a traitor. Take him away!

    Kellex is marched away down the hallway towards an Apple Holding Cell.

    END SCENE.

    Imagining Darth Jobs failing to ignite his iSaber because he is left-handed also makes me giggle.

    - Crow

    • Joesred

      Please do not tell me we have to wait until 9/30/2010 for R2D2 Droid to break Kellex out.
      Will Fed-Ex deliver to the A**ple holding cell?

  • Justin

    This is what happens when you make a dent in the apple bank account.. you become a missing person.

    Apple is like a mob family.

    Mobs & Jobs

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QVGCTFOMW2W74MSCLHEOC7SLLA MixMaster

    Don't worry. If we cannot find him, eventually the iPunks will try to hold him the wrong way and lose hold on him lthe same way they lose their reception on their lame phones. He'll make his escape before any of them admit that there's a problem. LOL!

  • venomX0125

    he's with elvis, tupac, and bigfoot there planning a break in at steve jobs house to plant porn all over the place so steve jobs can know what a woman actually looks like… lol

  • Surfgirl757

    Hey guys I think Mr.P May have hidden Kellex in the basement and Taken over Droid -Life . Isn't it obvious who would have left that guy in charge. lol

    • Mrpicolas

      shhh…..

      • Joesred

        OH NO!!!! I expanded Mrpicolas' profile…look close..you will see he is wearing…
        A BLACK TURTLENECK!!!!!!!!
        Conspiracy! I got lulled by the
        http://www.droid-life.com/2010/08/17/ask-dr-roo
        yesterday. It was just to pacify us. Mrpicolas wanted us to believe Kellex was at the Adobe Android Summit.
        What have you done Mrpicolas….if that is really who you are.

        Has there been a complete take over of Droid-Life?
        Is anyone who they really say they are?

        I am so scared!!!